Hey, I’m Dumb and Here’s Why: A Moment on Suicide and My Stupidity*

*Please note this post discusses suicide and may be triggering for some. The National Suicide Hotline for those in need: 1-800-273-8255. HEY FRIENDS! Today I watched the Virgin Suicides for the first time. Not the most uplifting of movies, but who would’ve guessed with that title? I know I’m about 15 years too late and I’m not sure… More Hey, I’m Dumb and Here’s Why: A Moment on Suicide and My Stupidity*

Do Not Microwave Your Dirty Sponge or You Will be a Sad Person

Are you a sad person? Is it because you microwaved your sponge? I know most of you cried out with  resounding “YES!” to both those questions, so I’ll just cut to the chase. If for by some reason you answered “no” to the second question, which I know is highly unlikely, then I’m going to dispense… More Do Not Microwave Your Dirty Sponge or You Will be a Sad Person

Ok Cupid 

I unintentionally joined a dating site and I already feel ashamed about it. I signed up originally to look at the format first hand, so I made my profile picture Enrico Palazzo (aka Frank Drebin from The Naked Gun) and answered all the questions with “singing the Star Spangled Banner.” Unfortunately, the admins quickly realized… More Ok Cupid 

Peanuts and Tomatoes

Hey clam sauces, I was thinking today about my new phrase, “peanuts and tomatoes, amiright?!”  It’s a great way to impress your friends with this hit phrase that means “same difference.”  The origin? I feel the same way about peanuts as I do tomatoes. I’m also an idiot.  BUT hear me on this. I don’t… More Peanuts and Tomatoes