Am I a Forty-Four Year Old Woman?

I’ve compiled a list of things I do/have done/think that have lead me to believe that I am really a middle-aged woman. 

1) Subscribing to a wellness magazine.

2) That wellness magazine is Oprah’s “O” Magazine.

3) Enjoying a nice Julia Roberts film on a week night.

4) Started calling TV shows “programs”. Hey, have you ever seen that Everybody Love Raymond program?

5) Loud noises, please stop. Turn down the TV. Turn the radio off. SHUT UP.

6) I’ve spent  half my paycheck on various scents and sizes at The Yankee Candle Factory.

7) I keep a pack of Sucrets stashed in my car. And my purse. And my bra.

8) Gloria Estefan, amiright?

9) “I just think dressing conservatively is more tasteful.” -A statement I’ve made.

10) 8 o’clock bedtime! Let me just finish my glass of Turning Leaf!

Amen xoxox.

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