I’ve been working on a mega-submission for a website that recently cut down its non in-house contributors and haven’t been in the frame of mind to thought-dump on here. I also started outlining a group of essays I’d like to make into a collection but where do I fit choking on a potato chip in with being a 12 year old girl getting mistaken for a man? I guess in the same sentence. It’s been difficult as I have to constantly remind myself I’m not competing with anyone, don’t have to live up to anyones (probably non-existent) expectations, and that I’m not on a deadline, although all feel true and pressing. I would love to continue doing standup too. Right now the few bits I have are feeling tired and the ideas I do have are better served in long form. I have a boxful of premises I have written down and put aside so hopefully there will be some gems to mine in there once the other projects settle down.
I also started an Instagram page for my alter ego, Troll Girl. The “troll girl” handle was already taken so now she’s the “lonely troll girl” although she’s not very lonely.
The interesting thing about creative work is that you feel like everyone is staring at you and yet no one is looking at the same time. When I’m not working on something I get nervous that I’m wasting time and resources and melting into obscurity – but also – can’t a bitch play her Sega Genesis in peace?
Anyways, I bought a wig for my Yeti stuffed animal and we are going to talk about various types of baking techniques.