The more I fiddle around on WordPress, the more I realize I have no idea how to use it.

Same goes for Gravatar. Do we not live in an age where the photo you just updated should actually update? I need answers people. Immediate gratification. Which is why I watched 8 episodes of Game of Thrones today. 

Patience has never been in my wheelhouse. I’m looking up “wheelhouse”  right now because I’m not sure I’m even know what it means. I NEED TO KNOW NOW. Is it synonymous with “skill set?” To be continued. 

In disturbing news, I straightened my hair today (keep reading). As most hair-straightener-users know, that when you turn the temperature dial up to 450 degrees, your hair tends to smoke when the volcanic plates press your hair into submission. It’s something I’ve known since I was in 9th grade when I first starting burning my curls. In that 10 years, I’ve never experienced the travesty I did today. As my tresses were screaming for mercy under my godless rule, smoke billowed up (from the heat defender spray you have to douse your hair in so it doesn’t turn into a bail of hay) I turned my head towards my fire locks. A mouth breather by default when I’m by myself, I inhaled a puff of smoke. Very similar feeling of when you smoke for the first time. Burn, burn, hack, hack, hack, burn, hack. It was a sensation and taste I wish on no enemy. I have no enemies, but again, Game of Thrones. I’ve been talking to my cat in an English accent for the past couple days. Good thing she doesn’t know what “whore” means. 

In more disturbing news, I’m still looking for a job. Hire me to write the next big sitcom? Cool, cya there. 

Lots of love or something,

Lolo von Burntmyhairandateittoobergstein