Published! Hip Hip HOORAY.

I said HOORAY, God dammit.

This week I hit a very big goal that’s been on my vision board for a few years. Although I think it’s taken me longer than the average person to succeed with this, I think it made the fruition of it more special. BUT I’ve made it onto McSweeney’s!

Here’s the link to my list:

List: Honest Résumé Objectives

Check it out, share it, print it, burn it, press it onto a t-shirt, make it into a mug, tattoo it on your ass.

Thanks!

ALSO, this week is the Women in Comedy Festival in Boston! Headlining tonight is Maria Bamford at the Wilbur. I wish I could go but I went to Bobcat Goldthwait, Eugene Mirman, Aziz Ansari last week and I went to Target twice. Now I’m sitting at my desk eating baker’s chocolate out of the bag and writing poetry about my period.

Ciao muthafuckas,

❤ Lo

Hey Snatches, Day 28

HEY!

I don’t think I’ve ever used the word “snatch” until now.

I’m not even really sure what it’s supposed to mean.

Anyways, Day 28! Blerg Challenge.

I like the spectrum of these questions. We jumped from what kind of food I like, to the deep underbelly in which my psyche dwells.

That being said, today’s question: What are you looking forward to?

That’s a pretty big question because I’m looking forward to sucking back an iced coffee tomorrow morning, but I’m also looking forward to havin’ some babies some day, maybe, I guess? (Probably not? K bye).

I think the most current exciting thing I’m looking forward to is taking more sketch writing classes. Second City has an awesome online writing program for peoples who can’t get out to Chicago. I took all the classes they had for online writing last year and have been staring at my computer screen until they added more classes. SO YAY!

I also got a new phone because ol’ reliable told me to shut up and go to hell. On the upside, now I can make videos for you to giggle or throw up at.

Anyhoo, I’m gonna go smear some chocolate into my mouth.

Until next time, my little gingerspread clams!

Blog Shell-Hands: DAY FOUR

Fourth day of the blog challenge.

I went to go see the B52’s and GoGo’s last night. 

I’ll write all about that when I have more time.

BUT Day Four: What are you afraid of?

On the surface I would say I’m afraid of sinkholes. Those pop up wherever the fuck they want. Could be right under your toilet.

I’m also afraid of not being able to save my cats. I have dreams that I’m trying to run away with them from something menacing like coyotes or tornadoes. 

One of my more deeper fears is not succeeding how I want to. I have ENORMOUS goals career wise, so when I lay in bed at night, in my Barbie pajamas, I wind up thinking about all the things I should be doing instead of sleeping.

What are you afraid of? Spiders? Monkeys? Spider Monkeys?

Until next time, my little bamboo shoots.