POKEYMANZ

I’ve reawakened my love for Pokemon the past few weeks. I’ve been watching the Indigo League seasons and wearing my new Pokemon hat every day because I’m a big fat freak. Anyone who comments on my hat and brings up how much they like Pokemon, I immediately have to challenge them to a Pokemon name-off. No one has taken me up on the offer and has swiftly walked away. It’s probably for the better, my competitive side is not sportsmanlike. Or ladylike. Or likable at all.

After the first Pokemon movie I drifted out of it. Just like I did after the Rugrats first movie. The movies always seem to derail the series. Get your new characters and weird new animation OUTTA MY FACE.

In other news, I’m writing out my Christmas cards. After I send them out, I’ll post the photos here as to not spoil the surprise.

SO. What’s yer favorite packymanz? I like Bulbasaur because he’s très adorable. Is he my number 1 hitter? No. But again, TRÈS ADORABLE. Are there any shows that got ruined for you after their movie or any particular turn (FOR THE WORSE?)

LET ME KNOW!

k bye i love you remember to wipe your butt.

$19 In My Bank Account

Have you ever gone shopping and just completely disregarded your budget and bought the soundtrack to Disney’s Frozen? and some mascara? and a KitKat bar?

Strange, ME TOO!

Looks like we’ll both be staying home and watching reruns* of The Wire on our laptops in our mothers’ house. (*Reruns is the new term for “has been renting each season’s DVD set at the local library.” Speaking of which, can you even rent from a library you are not local to? They got rules about that shit.)

While we’re in our homes this weekend, watching our reruns, we can also SELL A BUNCH OF STUFF ON THE INTERNET! In preparation of my move (as mentioned in a previous post, which I’m SURE you’ve read) I’ve been packing up my precious items and discarding items that I know longer need/won’t fit in the UHaul. Need a children’s jewelry box? How about 4 of them? No? We just keep discovering how alike we are! I have an impressive snow globe collection, books, and clothes. Sorry, not giving away my stuffed animals, if I ever need to barricade my door from and intruder or need to choke serial killer, then I’d be really up a creak without a Build-a-Bear. (Thank God I have 6.)

Well my charlatans, it’s bedtime! I’ll let you know if I find some coins in the sofa or behind the washing machine. We can go get ice cream, my treat!

K, love you, bye.

The Truth Is Out There

There have been some odd happenings lately. I’m not entirely sure if it’s because I’ve been watching no less that 3 episodes of the X-Files per day for the last 2 weeks, or …no, that’s definitely it, but stay with me.

It’s been a long running joke in my family that my mom was abducting from our house sometime in the early 90’s. She claimed that there were bright lights and that she woke up standing next to her bed, no conscious memory of time (which we all know is a clear indicator of alien presence.)

This leads me to yesterday. I started joking with a co-worker about how I could possibly be a figment of my own imagination, and that of everyone I work with. I then retold the story of my mom’s alien abduction, and pointed out that maybe, just maybe I was an alien spawn given to my mother to birth and that her abduction was just some sort of intergalactic visitation rights. We laughed. Heehee hawhaw.

That’s when a car pulled into the office driveway, and suddenly the power went out. The lights went out, computers shut down, the toilet even stopped running. We looked out the window, but could not identify who was driving the car, and as they pulled away, all the lights came back on. Which could only mean one thing:

I know too much. And as the X-Files shows, the government is in on the whole thing, and whoever that driver was, was trying to distract us. So what happened next?

I went home, played bingo, went to bed.

Until today. The office dog started frantically barking and chewing at her retractable leash, trying to break open the plastic. My theory is that she senses a disturbance, and the leash is bugged. That’s how White Car knew we were onto something with extra-terrestrial talk.

It all falls together.